Thursday, October 15, 2009

Ring My Bell

A late-night chat with an online buddy:

Him - “You should get Skype so that we can finally talk face-to-face.”

Me - “Dude… you know we’ve met in person, right?”

Him - “We have? When?”

Me - “At PantheaCon 2008. We sat next to each other during the ‘Dangerous Herbs of the Witches’ workshop.”

Him - “We did?”

Me - “Yep. After that, we hung out in the GLBT hospitality suite, where we got into a lengthy debate about the merits of emerging shamanic paths versus British Traditional Wicca…”

Him - “Okay, I did go the hospitality suite. But to be honest, I drank a lot that weekend. And I met tons of people. It’s all kind of a blur. I’m sorry, but I just don’t remember you.”

Me - “… and then a drop-dead gorgeous, 7-foot-tall guy with dark, soulful eyes and really large hands told us about the time he got fucked in the ass on a church altar.”


Him – “Oh. My. God.”

Me – “Yeah.”

Him – “Oh, my God, Evn!!! We were out on the balcony, you were wearing a green plaid shirt and standing to my left, it was a balmy evening with a light breeze blowing in from the Southwest…”

And that’s how you jog a memory.


Debra She Who Seeks said...

See, the devil really is in the details, LOL!

Brother Christopher said...

It's so funny how we are wired.

Evn said...

Debra: Nice one. ;)

Christopher: Ain't it, though? And finding the right switch to flip can be a lot of fun in itself.

Patientes said...

I'm.... speechless.

Evn said...

That's what he said.

treecat said...

I have nothing to add, but "wingsit" is yet another word verification I just have to remark upon.

knottybynature said...

And people wonder why particular shades of plaid just PISS ME OFF.

Have you ever seen Pinky and the Brain? There's one episode where it does through exactly how Pinky comes up with those weird sayings. "Pinky, are you thinking what I'm thinking?" "Sure, Brain, but I'm not sure how we would get the hippo in the thong."

There is actually a perfectly logical explanation for how he comes to those conclusions.

You gave him a few descriptors, and it opened entire doorways of memories. A few words, a color, a turn of phrase can do the same thing for good and bad.

Your, however, is funnier. :D

Evn said...

Treecat: You were totally there when the above-metioned backstory went down.

Okay, so you weren't there there, but we were in the same hotel at the same time. Totally counts.

Knotty: Coincidentally, I have a long, painful, deeply personal history with Pinky and the Brain. A story in itself, possibly to be shared at a later date. But all that aside... yes, exactly.

Veles said...

So much more fun than doing the Stations of the Cross.

Last time I went to church I got a finger rosary. I'm going to file a complaint.

Evn said...

I got a plastic glow-in-the-dark rosary once. I think I still have it somewhere.

Thalia Took said...

Aw, I'm sorry about that, Evn. I found Pinky and the Brain to be quite nice, myself. But then that's because the Brain said I was lovely and talented, and Pinky proposed marriage to me. And then he gave me a hug and kissed me.

Gods'-honest truth, that actually happened.

Pax said...

Oh Evn

You always know just what to say!


knottybynature said...

Evn, I love you and I would never intentionally bring up the idea of two white lab mice to make you relive any sort of unpleasant experiences you'd ever had.

Anonymous said...

*snorflesputter* LMAO!!! You are one of the funniest people I don't know...

knottybynature said...

Woohoo! 69 FOLLOWERS!

That's a commemorative number, Evn.

WV: wiess - I swear I saw 'wise ass'.

Magaly Guerrero said...

He is probably deleting new followers, just so he can keep it at 69 lol

Um... Evn, I think your blog is full of Honest HILARIOUS Scrap, so I nominated you for an award that says that much. Stop by Pagan Culture and collect ;)

Albion Moonlight said...

Isn't that part of the Anglican ritual of church deconsecration?

Dr. E. said...

I was the person on the other end of the phone... and yes, it took the image of the monk getting fucked on the altar in a catholic church to remind me.

But you have to admit... that's an image that you'll never get out of your mind. I wonder if he had to shift the rosary tied around his waist because it was biting into his lower back?

Evn said...

But you have to admit... that's an image that you'll never get out of your mind.

LOL Yeah, it's pretty much seared in.

I wonder if he had to shift the rosary tied around his waist because it was biting into his lower back?

How long are those rosaries, anyway? Maybe they just used it for a little light bondage...