Saturday, December 13, 2008

Technology is not my friend

"Look, Evn! I hooked up a new DVD player for you!"

"Wow! Thank you, Jack!"

[Evn fiddles with the remote.]

"Um, does the little red light mean it's on or off?"

"It's on standby."

"Okay... does that mean it's on or off?"

"There is no on/off anymore. Appliances stay on standby until you're ready to use them!"

"That makes me uncomfortable."

"Just please don't break this one."


Thalia Took said...

This ties in with the recent Google word verification phenomenon, doesn't it? Just yesterday I got "unbad."

Something is reaching critical mass.

I'm scared.

Evn said...

My last word verification was "Defila," which I think would be an amazing name for a comic book villianess.

Red Delicious said...


I have no idea what that means.

Still, remember what they sang about in Reefer Madness,

"It's time for someone to take a stand,
'til the things that scare us are burned or banned"

I'll bring torches!

Evn said...

I have no idea what that means.

Aclogau was the ancient Mayan deity of Facebook and Twitter.

I'll bring torches!

To which I can only respond with the best xkcd strip ever.

Thalia Took said...

I'll bring cookies!

I do believe aclogau is a French term for a particular method of de-glazing a pan using fish stock. It's especially used in the south, if I'm remembering correctly.

And Defila, you are correct, is an awesome name for a comic-book villainess. I think she should go up against the crailkan, apparently some sort of giant seaweed-squid hybrid, which just happens to be my word verification word now. Hmmmm.

(Does Google know that you don't like large cephalopods, Evn? 'Cause that would be extra scary.)

Evn said...

Does Google know that you don't like large cephalopods, Evn?

If this made it to Google, then I am beyond fucked. Pray for me.

(PS: my verification word is "meters." Google has moved into recognizable English.)

Pom said...

At the risk of sounding like the fuddy-duddy Pagan, "stand-by" translates as "continues to drain electricity". Though these things can be unplugged when not in use.... (please don't hit me, Jack) :o)

verification - matti

Evn said...

Pom, good point (and no worries, Jack's very nonviolent). Now I just have to figure out how this thing plugs in...

Le Cornichon said...

I personally ADORE any appliance that pretends to be a Ritz Carlton Concierge...

Sage said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
knottybynature said...


Poodles of sniglets.

Anonymous said...

'"stand-by" translates as "continues to drain electricity"'

Yeah, Pom, but your phone most likely draws more current to backlight its screen than your DVD player draws to keep itself on standby.

In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if unplugging the thing causes you to burn more energy in *body heat* than leaving it plugged in would cost you in electricity, especially if you have to bend over or otherwise do extra work to get to the power plug. Consider also that, for every unplugging, there must be a corresponding *re*plugging, thus incurring yet further caloric expense.

So, you know, unplugging it will save you $0.00001/month on your power bill, but will probably add ~$0.0005/month to your food bill. How economical is *that*? :)

-- Aaron, who has no Blogger account