Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Evn on the Eve of the Election

My polling station is a Catholic Church a couple of blocks over from my apartment complex. After placing my vote, I ducked into the sanctuary for a quick prayer.

I will admit to feeling a little guilty about praying to the Goddess of the Witches in the middle of a Catholic Church. But they've got this amazing, floor-to-ceiling Queen of Heaven mosaic along the back wall, depicting the Virgin Mary in the standard Artemis at Ephesus pose, that frankly couldn't get any more Pagan if they tacked a "Please Remove Clothes Before Venerating" sign to it. So I figure no harm done.

I did not, as my Strifemongers might assume, pray for Obama to win. It just was my usual daily devotion, albeit carried out in a different venue. However, I did make a deal.

If Obama wins...

[Jack, you're going to want to sit down for this one.]

If Obama wins, I promise to stop expressing my political views in ways that mortally offend the people around me.

For example, I will no longer scream, "Fuck you! Fuck you, I hate you!" at the television while Jack is trying to watch the news. I will no longer make proclamations like, "I don't care what you think: If he willingly represents the entire republican party, then he is, in fact, a bad person." I will no longer suggest that the world would be a better place if Sarah Palin were to be eaten by wolves.

So that's my offering; my sacrifice. I agree to muzzle myself, so long as the situation at hand resolves itself in a truly necessary change.

That said, should things work themselves out otherwise, I have free reign to develop a spontaneous, acute and unstoppable case of Tourette's, the likes of which this world has never seen.

So, for me, it's win/win. But I'd prefer things get better for everyone.

11 comments:

knottybynature said...

ROFLMAO.

I *LOVED* the Tourette's comment. Absolutely *LOVED* it. I think that self-sacrificing comment made my evening. Thank you.

*cackling madly*

Souris Optique said...

That must've pushed it over the edge.;) Woot!

Deborah said...

So now, are you really going to do it? Because seriously, you promised the Goddess.

Evn said...

Yes. I've already put it into effect. Jack's a little worried about me, but relieved.

Evn said...

Knotty, you should have seen me after the last election. My co-workers wouldn't let people in our office talk to me, i.e., "Please don't set him off again."

Souris, I take full credit.

Beverly said...

"... so long as the situation at hand resolves itself in a truly necessary change." I love if's.

Lisa Adams said...

*grin* This should be fun. hehehehehehe.

Pax/Geoffrey said...

"Please Remove Clothes Before Venerating"

We need to get you designing a temple...

Evn said...

Pax, I'm already on it.

Pom said...

My face hurts from smiling - but I still saw plenty that will keep me cussing for awhile... I made no promises to stop being passionate about the injustices that take place. I will only offer an apology if my outbursts offend anyone who's unfortunate enough to have to hear them.

To the future.... Now all things are more possible than they were yesterday. And to fighting the good fight.

Evn said...

To the future.